BIGGER HINT!!

Okay, Family.

I know how much everyone loves Bleu and me. I talked to him on the phone again yesterday. He seems to be doing better with thinking that everything is dumb, and hating life. He really misses me and says that I'm the only thing that keeps him going because I'm the only one who writes him letters. He's having a pretty rough time and feels like he needs more support. PLEASE, PLEASE PLEASE send him some mail. It's the only thing that they have to look forward to and he doesn't get very much. I do what I can, but I really can't send him a letter every single day. He needs to hear from other people. It only takes a few days to get to him, but his letters take a few WEEKS to get to me. So if you plan on writing more than one, don't wait for a response before writing again. Tell the kids that he needs letters, too. I think he would love that. His address is a few posts down so scroll down, copy it, and start a letter. PLEASE.

I love you all and thankyou for the support you give me.

I Got a Phone Call!!

Today was the Primary Program in sacrement. When the closing prayer was said, I was getting all of my music and posters together, when Sara came up to me (which was a surprise because her Single's Ward starts at 1 and it was barely 12) and said "Bleu wants you to call him now. He called at 11 but I wasn't going to come up here in the middle of the program, plus I wasn't even dressed."

Of course-the one time that I am away from my phone for more than 5 minutes, and that's the time he calls. I got my phone from my bag and the screen said 17 missed calls. I opened it fast and the last one was sent one minute before. So I called and got the answering machine. I started to cry right there at the front of the chaple. He sent me a text message telling me to call and two voice mails. So teary-eyed, I headed for the door calling my voicemail when my phone started vibrating and I saw that it was him. So we got to talk on the phone for about an hour. It was good to hear his voice again, but he sounds tired and "sick and tired." He told me that he's hungry and that they get 3 meals a day. The food's not that good, but he likes (and by "likes" he means that he hates it the least ) breakfast. He gets gritts, bacon, eggs, and pancakes. "It's better than the other stuff they give us." he says.

He asked if I had gotten any of his letters and that the first day they got mail, one girl got 12 letters from her family in one day. I asked him if he's gotten any and he said "None." So he's feeling pretty neglected. So PLEASE send him some mail as soon as you can, he would really appreciate it.

Well that's pretty much it for now. I'm finishing up a letter for him today so I can send it tomorrow. So maybe for Family Home Evening, since the Primary is learning about being Thankful, they can tell the military how geatful they are for this free country that we live in. (Hint: please send him mail.)

Forgot to Include

I wanted to include Bleu's address so that if any of you want to write to him you can. They say that mail is something that they look forward to every day. So I'm going to try and write as often as I can, but I think letters from family would be great, too.

Prt Hawkley Bleu
C Co. 3/60 INF RGT
BLDG 5482
3 Plt Black Knights
Fort Jackson, SC 29207

Report from Prt. Hawkley

Well I finally got my first letter from Bleu today. YIPEE!! He said that the first few days were pretty bad. And pretty bad to Bleu means that they stood in lines all day. The first night they went to be at 12:30 and were woken up at 4.

He says that there are even more stupid people there than at drill and "the drill sargeants ar on fatty ego trips with post-traumatic stress so they blow up over everything." I was expecting that. There is lots of swearing, I was expecting that.

He is excited to say that Private Brown (really dumb and annoying 18 yr old kid who thinks he knows everything but really knows nothing) is not in his group. I think that was all he cared about, so I'm glad, too. There might be a slim chance that they will be able to use thier cell phones, most likely when they are off for church-I was NOT expecting that, but I'll take it!!

Thier group was given the three toughest Drill Sargeants, which I was VERY pleased to hear. It will be hard, but I think that means that he will come back that much better and they will be very well prepared and trained.

He said he wants to buy some spandex to wear for exercising because they were giving him "crap" about his garments---I told him to Buck up. :)

Sargeant Keegan made me promise that I would write "DROP" on the envelope so he will have to "drop" and do pushups before he gets his letter. I kissed it for extra measure. I like to be thorough. He might have to do an extra 20 for that. :)

Well that's the news for now, as for me, people at work and church ask me how I'm doing and to be honest, I'm doing much better than I thought I would. I'm playing the piano, and reading books and just relaxing. It's definately been QUIET, but I'm doing pretty good. It actually feels reassuring that I can take care of myself. I can pay rent and bills and insurance and phone and everything. I can go shopping by myself WITHOUT buying any candy (for once). I thought that I would have a huge gap of time to fill every day where I would just sit and think about Bleu and miss him and feel sorry for myself, but I don't. I fill my time pretty well and I do think about him and miss him sometimes but it's not like I thought it would be. It will be great to have him home for Christmas, but I am doing much much better than I was Dreading. :) But I'm not going to lie, I will probably cry like a baby AGAIN when he leaves AGAIN. But we will just take it one day at a time and keep on trudging down the road.

Love you!

Tag from Tammy

8 TV shows I love to watch
1. Scrubs
2. Dirty Jobs
3. Myth Busters
4. Umm that's even a stretch. I just don't watch TV.

8 favorite places I love to eat
1. At home with Bleu
2. Cafe' Rio
3. Applesbee's
4. Chiles
5. Red Lobster
6. Mom's house
7. anywhere with the family
8. ??

8 things that happened yesterday
1. Slept in (ahhhh)
2. Had a real breakfast-eggs and toast with mom
3. Took a hot shower (ahhhh)
4. beautified myself without hearing "are you done yet?" (ahhhhh)
5. went to a play with mom and Sara - Into the Woods
6. Set up and decorated for the Ward Chilli Cook off.
7. Stayed as long as I could stand and then some.
8. Went home and watched Enchanted with Sara and Mom

8 things I look forward to
1. Bleu coming home
2. December
3. Christmas
4. June
5. Kids
6. My Fridays off
7. Having more space
8. Bedtime

8 things I love about Fall
1. Crisp air
2. Pretty Leaves
3. wearing jackets and scarves
4. Thanksgiving
5. Halloween
6. Rain
7. The Smells
8. It reminds me of when Bleu and I were dating.

8 material things on my wish list
1. My Student Loans paid off
2. A house
3. New clothes
4. Season Tickets to Desert Star
5. Food Storage
6. a room for myself to do projects in like sewing or reupholstering
7. a Desktop Computer
8. an office to put it in where I can do bills and have everything orgainized

8 people I'm tagging
1. Nan
2. Torrie
3. Camille
4. Katie
5. Trina
6. Jennifer
7. Jamie
8. Raelynn

CONVERSATIONS

So this is my curiosity. And another way to get the ball rolling.... again.

What do you talk with your spouse about?? Obviously if you work at different places, or one works and the other stays at home, you talk about what you did during the day. Aside from the day-to-day things, what conversations do you have? How do you verbally express appreciation to eachother, what are the little things that build eachother up??

okay, I can tell you're thinking about it, now go! comment, post, blog, you bloggers, BLOG!!

Tiggety Tag!

This one is way fun. I saw it on a friend's blog and I learned a lot about her. Please fill out one for yourself on your blogs!!

I think: About things all the time. They don't even have to be important things. My mind is always going ninety miles an hour. The sad part is that usually it never about anything important or what I should be thinking about. I think about my life, husband, family, friends, world, the choices we've made..... But then I think about what we are having for dinner, what there is in the fridge, in the cupboards,...... I think my mind might explode one day!!

I know: that Heavenly Father knows all of my thoughts and is probably thinking-Mickaela, you silly, silly girl. Haven't we been through this SO MANY times?? RELAX and enjoy life. I know who I am and I know He LOVES me more than I could mortally understand. I know that He has a specific plan just for me and our little family and I know that whatever happens, He's aware of me.

I want: SO many things! I feel selfish saying what I want because I AM the youngest and people think that I get whatever I want but I really don't. I want to be a wonderful person inside and out, I want to be an amazing wife and mother, I want to have a SUPER close relationship with my husband - closer than anyone, I want to make a difference, I want to be an example for good, I want to learn to sew, cook, keep the house clean for more than an hour, I want to keep the closeness that I have with my sisters.... the list could go on forever.

I have: A wonderful life!!! I have a husband who loves me and would do anything for me, a whole family who raised me with lots of love, I have a roof over my head, food in my cupboards, clothes on my back, a job, money in the bank, DEBT, I have an excitement for life and the crazy things that go on in it, I have Desire, and a Testimony.

I wish: There were more hours in a day so that I could do all of the things that I want to do! I wish I would have started school when I was 18 instead of 20. I wish I would have listened to my heart when it told me This is a very bad IDEA!! I wish I was wonder woman and could do everything at once.

I hate: When people are fake, snide, rude, unjust, belittleing, cheap, selfish. I hate when I feel Satan's presence and know that he is fighting to chase the Spirit away just as hard as I am praying for it to stay with me. I hate feeling like I'm anything less than great or that I CAN"T.

I miss: My family sometimes when I'm alone thinking about all of the fun we had when we were kids. I miss getting into trouble and trading corners when mom and dad weren't looking, playing school with Katie and Trina, fighting with Katie and Trina, telling Katie "you're not my mom!" I miss mom's chocolate chip cookie bars and how we had to eat them while they were hot or they would be too hard, getting up to get a drink, and ending up getting a drink for the entire family, getting lost in the wilderness on a "short cut"

I fear: Losing my family.

I smell: Nothing unless I'm really close to it, or I'm pregnant.

I crave: Mom's Sausage and Rice Casserole, Pork Chops n Rice, Sweedish Meatballs, Sweet n Sour Meatballs, homemade huckleberry ice cream...... Anything cooked over the fire.

I search: For my phone, my keys, my pen, my other shoe, my purse........ pretty much everything because I forget where I put everything....... until Bleu finds it, then I remember putting it there. and then he laughs at me.

I wonder: What Heavenly Father has in store for me. I have lots of clues and ideas, but I still wonder.

I regret: Mickey. And a few others that I let lead me on and make me feel like the least important human on earth.

I love: My Family, the sunshine, FOOD, playing, progressing, laughing till it hurts, hearing babies giggle, watching the first attempts, cheering on people I love, comforting those I love.

I care: too much sometimes. I care about what people think when I shouldn't. I care deeply for people around me, and my family.

I always: try not to give up. Sometimes all I want to do is just give up. And I ALWAYS try not to. I have to keep going and keep pushing no matter how hard it is.

I am not: a conformist. I don't do what everyone else does just because everyone else is doing it. If I want to do something, I'll do it. I have developed into a pretty uniquely stubborn individual and if I feel like doing something, I'm going to do it. I don't do it just to be different from everyone for spite, but I do the things I do for my reasons - not just to be different -

I believe: in God, Jesus Christ, The Spirit, Bleu and Me. I believe that God has a plan for me, for us. I believe that Christ hung on the cross and bled for me. I believe that the Spirit is with me when I invite him in. I believe Bleu when he tells me how wonderful I am and how much he loves me. I believe that God is watching and that our son/daughter is cheering us on to the finish line.

I dance: with Bleu. and that's almost the only time I feel comfortable dancing. I don't dance alone very often, but when I do, it's only for select people cause it's just down right strange.

I sing: constantly. I am always singing either out loud or in my head. I love it. It's one thing that I absolutely love to do.

I don't always: have a deep desire to clean. Sometimes I just feel like leaving the dishes, leaving the laundry, not showering, and just staying in bed and cuddling with my husband. I guess it's okay because he hasn't complained yet.

I write: what I am thinking in the moment that I write. I write whatever is bothering me, what is perplexing me, what is making me happy, sad, mad. I write stories, I write what happens between me and other people. I write lists constantly. To do lists, Grocery lists, I write lyrics to songs I already know.

I lose: faith in myself. I loose sight of all of the good things about me and get caught up in the things that aren't perfect. I lose my keys, my phone, my purse, and pretty much whatever I need at the moment.

I win: Zilch when I play against Bleu. Haha.

I never: want to grow up completely. I never want to grow old in my heart, I never want to stop acting like a newlywed, I never want to stop loving, I never want to give up on anything or anyone.

I listen: to the Spirit and try to know what I should do. I listen to Bleu and know that he is listening to the Spirit, too.

I can usually be found: wherever Bleu is. We spend more time together than I have ever spent with anyone EVER and I can't get enough of him. It amazes me how we've known eachother for two years, been married for seven months, spend as much time as possible together and I would still rather be with him than anybody else in the world. I love him so much.

I am scared: of heights, because I hate the feeling of falling, and I'm scared of mirrors in the dark. It's just about the creepiest thing I can think of.

I need: positive reinforcement. Negetivity sticks like honey and I need to be positive, and someone to be positive with me even when I'm covered in honey. Sometimes it's really hard for me to be positive especially when it comes to myself. I beat myself up about everything and Satan takes every opportunity he can get to make me feel like I'm not great. It's easy to see the good in others-it's better to show it to them.

I am happy about: where my life is going, who I have to share my life with, the choices I have made, the people I have around me, the love that I share.